Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
