I must be too annoying 4 u.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Randomize
