Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
