I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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