the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
