just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize