My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
