Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
