After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize