i was born a porn star she said
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I am naked and annoyed.
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