I just saw a hot homeless man
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
