The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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