She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize