you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
