You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
