Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
