Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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