Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize