There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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