she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize