He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize