he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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