The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
this is an emotional support booty call
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
