Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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