I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
