This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
