Your tits are I can't wait for
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Also, beer. Big fan.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
