they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Help me help you realize you are a moron
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
