census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
