Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize