I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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