Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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