can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Randomize
