i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I am available for nakedness
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize