Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize