i think my tv is drunk
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
