I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
