Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
