I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
