Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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