Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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