Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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