mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
