Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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