Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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