i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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