well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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