i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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