apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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