Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
